Stranger Danger

As my wife discovered some months ago, strangers are more than willing to make comments about most things related to pregnancy and not all of them are positive (see The Perfect Package).  Pushing my daughter around in her buggy, I have discovered that strangers are also willing to make comments towards new parents about their children and the 'joys' or parenting.  Most of the comments I have received have been about how beautiful my daughter is.  I couldn't agree more.  It fills me with pride and I have to admit that I do, unreasonably, find myself getting annoyed when people don't make comments about Daisy.  However, some comments I have received haven't been so positive.  Funny, maybe, but not the gushing comments I have become accustomed to.

One such comment got me very worried recently.  On my way back from picking up the Sunday paper from the local shop, a gentleman, who had been in the shop too, caught up with Daisy and I to give me a pearl of wisdom.  After the usual small talk about Daisy's gender (as if the pink blanket didn't give it away) and age, this man, whom I'd never met before, imparted the following words of wisdom: 'The first word you need to teach her is 'elope'!'

Here was a man who had clearly spent a lot of money on his daughter's wedding.  Maybe there was more than one daughter and more than one wedding.  Looking at the slightly manic look in his eyes as he bitterly exclaimed the word 'elope', this is entirely possible.  I laughed nervously and the conversation was soon over.  When I'd returned to the house, the reality of this stranger's comments hit me.  We have already set Daisy up with a cash ISA and bank account.  We will regularly save money for her so that when she turns 18 she will have some funds to help with university fees or for travelling (I'm pretending the latter is an option, but it won't really be!)  I started to panic.  Do I need to start saving for her wedding already?  Having paid for our own wedding last year, my wife and I have a good understanding of the excessive amounts of cash that can be spent on one day.

 

Fortunately, the panic and worry didn't last long.  I suddenly remembered what I have consistently reminded my daughter since her birth.  There will be no boys.  Ever.  Therefore, no wedding.  Ever.  I am sure this is what every new dad thinks about his little girl.  Of course, it rarely works out like this.  But, I can dream, can't I?

The reality is that my daughter already has me wrapped around her little finger.  Although, as my wife pointed out recently, there are worse things to be wrapped around (I'm not sure if this was a subtle personal insult or not!)  So, it is entirely possible that Daisy will be able to persuade me some time before her thirty-fifth birthday that she should be allowed out on dates with boys.  Therefore, my only other way of ensuring that boys stay away is to be an intimidating father-figure.  I can imagine most of you who know me are sniggering, and the rest of you outright guffawing, at this suggestion.  You are right.  I am not at all intimidating. 

I guess I'll have to start saving for that wedding after all then. 

The Perfect Package

My wife is a beautiful woman.  She is a beautiful pregnant woman.  My mum told me a few weeks ago that she "...suits pregnancy".  It is true.  She looks fantastic.  I am, of course, biased.  But I know I am not the only person who thinks this.

The problem is that people often make comments about the size of her bump.  I wish they wouldn't!  It really bothers her.  I'm not talking about friends, family or colleagues.  I'm referring to strangers.  Strangers who are more than just a little bit rude (although I'm not sure how many of them are deliberately being rude).

My wife is a very positive person.  It takes a lot to annoy her.  Maybe not as much as it did before she was pregnant, but she is still very placid.  Yet, on more than a few occasions recently, people have said things to make her annoyed and self conscious.  My wife isn't very tall.  In fact she is just under 5 feet 2 inches tall.  (I know this should be written in meters and centimeters and the teacher in me is annoyed that it isn't, but not enough people work in metric, especially when measuring height.)  This mean that our daughter doesn't have anywhere to grow other than out!  However, the obstetrician we saw recently described the size of our bump as perfect.  It was exactly the size it should be.  But people still seem keen to comment on the size.

That's the funny thing about pregnancy.  People feel they can make personal comments to someone they have never met before.  Would these same people comment on a complete stranger's hairline, their weight, their height or their fashion sense?  Almost certainly not.  So why do they think it is okay when speaking to a pregnant woman?

After some people have asked my wife how long she has left, the common response has been, "Oh, are you having twins then?"  A close second is, "Oh, it looks like you're ready to drop now."  She isn't.  Baby isn't due until next month.  But, I'm now worried about going anywhere with my wife for the next few weeks in case someone says something they shouldn't and the fiery red-headed Welsh temperament she must have buried deep down somewhere finally takes over and she assaults someone.  I'm not saying they wouldn't deserve it but I'm not sure you are able to take babies on community service!

It might interest you though that,  when looking at a photo of herself at a recent wedding, my wife gasped, "Oh my god, I'm massive."  So maybe it isn't only strangers who make rude comments about the size of her bump!